Opposites Attract: 3 Things Beneficial in Marriage

Those who know my husband and I or who have spoken to both of us for any length of time knows that we are complete opposites.  I’m a mathematician, he’s a musician. I’m structured and logical, he’s laid back and goes with the flow. I’m an introvert, he’s an extrovert. But despite the fact that our personalities are opposites, I cannot imagine someone more suited for my needs.

Our opposites work to balance our personalities and our home. When I am stressing over something, he is able to calm me down and tell me it’s going to be okay. When he wants to lay back and chill, I am able to remind him of the goals that we have set for ourselves to complete. We have discussed this and realize how different our lives would be if we were married to someone more like ourselves. My life would be boring and stressful, stuck with someone who worries over the same things I do, while his would be carefree and unpredictable which sounds great for a while but gets old as you mature.

Here are a few things that I have found beneficial in my relationship with my husband. This is in no way a conclusive list as I am sure other couples have completely different things on their lists. But this is my blog so here are mine:

1. Being able to laugh together. I love that we can find things in common to laugh at. As opposites there are often times when my husband shows me things that are hilarious to him, but to me are not at all funny, but then there are times when I laugh so hard that I cry. Those moments bring us closer together.
2. Recognizing each other’s strengths. Males and females in general have different strengths, but that does not mean that they fit into a typical “gender role”. In our house they happen to appear that way; I take care of the cooking and the laundry and he never has to be reminded to take out the trash and I have never needed to learn how to cut the grass. Sometimes, however, you need your spouse to do something that is not their strength and that brings me to my next point.
3. Learning to speak your spouse’s language. I’m going to start by saying we are nowhere near “fluent” in each others languages. At best we are like tourists in another country reading from a guide-book: we know some basics and we try our best but sometimes we just fail. I have learned that if I am going to ask him to cook or do laundry I need to give very explicit details. We dated for 4 years before we got married and I thought I had him pretty well figured out. I have learned that living is a completely different experience.

I am very thankful that I followed the Lord’s leading in my marriage. I am working hard to continue to grow as Godly wife and preacher’s wife (but that’s another topic for another day).