I had so many other things that flashed through my mind to write about this week. I actually started two other blog posts this weekend. But then I decided I’d just share about these past few days. I hope it doesn’t come across as complaining or bragging. Because what I really want to share is what a blessing it is to have help and to encourage everyone to accept help – good help – when you really need it.
Independence
It’s kind of funny because near the end of my first year of teaching I feel like I was asked the same question several times. “What piece of advice would I share with a new teacher?” My answer was always, “be willing to ask for help.” As a teacher I used this all the time, but as a mom I’ve fallen into some old habits.
My husband will tell you I am a very independent person. I like to do things for myself. It is often easier for me to do things myself my way than trying to explain to someone else how to do it. Even more so is the difficulty with trusting someone else to do it, recognizing that they aren’t going to do it my way. I’ve already talked about my trust issues.
Needless to say this independence extends to my kids. I want to be the one to care for them and there is a level of guilt and failure that I feel when I struggle. So here is the scenario from this weekend. My husband was out of town on a job. I had made a few commitments to people to encourage me to get out of the house. The night before he left 2 children displayed a sickness or injury.
I get the kids up the next day and prepare for an outing number one which was a play date at a park. Going to a park with three toddlers is not the easiest thing to do, but I knew they would enjoy it and I didn’t want to cancel on the person we were meeting so we went. We had a great time. But long story short the previously injured child played in mulch and got splinters in her hand.
Accepting Help
Based on the advice from my mom, who I met up with after the play date, I took the girls home and gave them baths. I fed them lunch and made a phone call to the on call nurse and then the doctor’s office. We were given an appointment for later that afternoon. I put the girls to bed knowing they would have to wake up early in time for us to get to the appointment.
I wake them up starting with the oldest and she is whining like crazy. First, I thought it was just because she was tired. Then, I realized she kept messing with her ear and it dawned on me that she had been doing it all week. By the time we got the the doctor’s I decided she needed to be seen too. Turns out I had one child with an infected finger (not related to the splinters) and another with an ear infection. So I cancelled my other plans and prepared to go home and tough it out.
Until I got an offer for help.
There was a part of me that wanted to prove that I can take care of my own kids by myself while my husband is out of town. But then logic comes in and I decided that it would not be beneficial to anyone for me to just “tough it out”. So after dinner I packed a bag for the oldest, loaded up the car, and headed to pickup my groceries which I had ambitiously scheduled earlier in the day. It worked out though because it gave me a reason to meet my parents who were taking M for the night.
Recognizing the Blessing
Not only did my parents take M. But because I met up with them my mom helped get their prescriptions taken care of since my regular pharmacy was running behind. Also, M is not the best with taking medicine and it was a blessing to me not to have to give it that first night. I was able to go back home and put the twins straight to bed. I had time left to put all the groceries away and clean up the house. It was even early enough for me to have a little time to myself.
I could have very easily said “no, thanks. We’ll be fine.” when my mom offered to take M. But I am so thankful that I didn’t let my pride get in the way of my blessing. I know not everyone has the same level of help that I do and that makes me all the more grateful for it. I guess the goal of this post is for everyone to take a minute and realize what your blessings are and be thankful for them.
Maybe this weekend you can be thankful that your husband doesn’t have to travel. I know I’m glad that this isn’t a regular occurrence. Or your blessing could be that your children have been well recently. I definitely take advantage of those healthy times, which are more common than the sick ones. Whatever the reason, take a moment today to count your blessings and thank God for them. I know I am!
Martina