As my tagline states, this blog is dedicated to encouraging mothers, teachers, wives, and those in the ministry. This will probably be one of the few posts that covers all four of those areas in one. It is also something that I have both struggled with and benefited from over the years.
Teachers
I am a part of a scholarship program from my undergrad. After my first year of teaching I was repeatedly asked what advice would I give new teachers. Without hesitation my response was always, “Never be afraid to ask for help.” I have found that those in the teaching profession are generally willing to assist other teachers. Perhaps it is because that is basically our job description. I personally have enjoyed helping both new and veteran teachers when possible.
Teaching is an extremely stressful and challenging field. While college helps prepare you for the content and you are expected to complete internships, nothing completely prepares you for being in a room alone with thirty twelve-year-olds. Also, colleges and universities have a variety of methods for teaching. Every year I learn new methods and tools that I had never heard about from my colleagues. No one is going to look down on you for asking for help because we have all been there. So if you need help, ask and someone asks you be willing to share.
Ministry
A lot of times in ministry we feel like we need to do it all. We think things aren’t going to get done unless we do it. This tends to lead to burn-out where you don’t want to be involved in anything or, in extreme cases, backsliding. If you feel like no one is supporting you and your ministry, then why try at all, right? Wrong! You just need to take a step back and ask God what He wants you to be involved in. It may be helpful to speak with your leadership or a trusted elder about areas in which you can cut back. In some cases there may be someone who is looking for a way to get involved and you can “outsource” your duties to them.
In other cases you may need to completely remove yourself from a certain ministry. Over the past two years my husband and I had been involved in youth ministry. We truly enjoyed working with the young people and felt that it was where God wanted us for a time. However, after Baby Girl was born, we noticed that are roles were no longer needed. Additionally there were bigger changes that were taking place and we begin to pray about what we should do. To make a long story short we decided that our time working with the youth had ended and we needed to focus our efforts elsewhere.
This has been helpful to us both spiritually and naturally. It has allowed us to put more into other areas as well as provided us with more family time.
Marriage
Last summer, we were attending a young married’s event and our pastor spoke to us on this topic of asking for help. It was refreshing and encouraging to hear someone who we respected say that it is okay to ask for help overcoming bumps in marriage. Marriage takes work. Taking two people, who are possibly opposites, and bringing them together to work together, minister together, and raise a family is challenging.
Despite what the culture of our day is, marriage can work. My parents have been married over 30 years and I know many other couples that can say the same. The main things is to have Jesus as the center of your marriage. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”(NIV) You and your spouse may be able to fight through struggles, but if you put God first he will be the cord that strengthens. He can also lead you to Godly examples and influences that can help you in your relationship.
Motherhood
Finally, the most challenging one of all is motherhood. There is a huge issue in our culture with “mommy-shaming”. I will be honest and say I have had thoughts cross through my mind when I see some of the decisions that other parents make. Because of this trend, moms become reluctant to admit when they are struggling and need help. This is damaging not only to the mother, but also to the child(ren).
We, as mothers, need a support system of people we can trust to help us when we are down. We need people who will tell us it’s okay to have a bad day. It’s okay if you and the children stayed in your PJs for a day. This person should also be able to say, “now it’s time to get yourself together. Get up, get dressed, make breakfast, because you can do this”. If you don’t have a person or people like this in your life begin praying that God will lead you to someone who you can be a blessing to and I know He will bring you the help you need.